Monkey Time - Zach's in Asia

We're just about done here!

2008-08-11T07:12:00.000-07:00

Hello faithful readers... if any of you are still reading after my lazy spell of posting NOTHING.

Hopefully these few posts will quench your thirst for worldly travels. It seems like ages ago since Jennie and I embarked on this long journey across southeast Asia. We've had some amazing times, seen incredible things, and met great people along the way. Some of the best times came from the completely unexpected and unplanned for; let that be a lesson about trying to plan too hard! Can you believe I'm saying that Madame?

Anyways, we're back in exactly one week! Hope you enjoy these posts about Malaysia: the Perhentian Islands, KL, Mulu National Park in Borneo, and the Orangutan sanctuary near Kuching, again in Borneo.

Miss you all and can't wait to share our stories and pictures with you in person. Hope you've enjoyed reading the little posts I put down here. Maybe I'll have one or two more posts in HK before we go home. Stay tuned...

Cheers from Borneo,
ZA

PS: BTW, that's a blurry, but cool pic of me on the canopy walk, in Mulu. 30 meters high, chilling in the jungle!

Orangutan Sanctuary - Kuching, Malaysia

2008-08-11T07:03:00.000-07:00

These primates rock! And the babies are the cutest little things. And this is coming from someone who generally loves all primates, right Jennie?

Sorry, Gibbons and Macaques: Orangutans are cooler than you! Chimps: you are still freaking awesome though!

A mama and her baby, chilling before the feeding time. They are amazing!

Chilling with some bananas and sugar canes. A simple, sweet life!

The big alpha male, Archie. He can rip your arms out of your socket, without even trying. Don't mess with Archie!

We also learned that Archie is a glutton, and isn't into sharing his food. He was pretty much alone while on the feeding platform, except for his woman and little baby, and even they kept their distance.

Archie, a.k.a. Sasquatch, making his get away into the jungle. The tree went on to bend about half way under his weight, allowing his to grab the next tree effortlessly. Smart guy!

Mama number 2 and her baby. They chilled right above us for a good 20 minutes looking at us, kissing each other, and generally having a good time. We later learned from a guide, that this particular mama has taken a liking to grabbing people's belongings, looking for food. One woman got her pack, and her shirt, ripped right off her. Yikes!

Seriously, how cute?

Mulu National Park: The Lost World!

2008-08-11T06:22:00.000-07:00

This has been by far one of THE highlights of this entire trip. While in Mulu, Jennie and I explored the world's largest cave passage in the Deer Cave (big enough for a 747 to fly through it and home to over 3 million bats, including the ones in the opening pic!), one of the world's longest cave systems in the Clearwater Cave (over 100 km explored thus far... and counting!) and climbed one of the world's 7 natural wonders: The Pinnacles, a grouping of 50 meter high, razor sharp limestone pinnacles formed by the devastating effects of water of a few million years. The climb usually takes people between 8-10 hours to get up and down the 2.4 KM long trail, which reaches a height of 1,200 meters, with an average slope between 45 and 90 degrees. Trust us it's steep! Jennie and I proudly accomplished the round trip in 7h40mins, including a 40 minute stint at the summit. The wake up call from Base Camp 5 was 4 AM, departure 5:40 AM in the dark with our head-lamps, return to camp 1:20 PM. One of the coolest things I've ever done!

Hope you enjoy the pics!

Jennie in front of our twin engine plan, on the Mulu Park airstrip.

On the back of our jeep, on route to the Park headquarters, with the mountains in the background.

The Deer Cave mouth just above the trees, in the giant limestone cliff.

Jennie and me after having tried, unsuccessfully, to sneak into the shee-shee poo-poo Royal Mulu Resort (the alternative to staying in the national park lodging) to use their pool on a crazy hot day. We made it into the pool with our travel buds Pat and Jessica, for about all of 15 seconds before asking us to either pay the $30 pool usage fee, or leave. We left, already refreshed anyway. HA!

That's one big tree trunk. Nuff said!

Jennie, 4 hours after departing from base camp 5, in front of The Pinnacles.

Me, looking very adventurer-like, in front of The Pinnacles. So manly, yes?

See that green rectangle, off in the horizon? That's the airstrip. Yeah, we're hardcore!

That's one sweaty and tired Zach after the 7h40mins mark.

KL: Capital City of Malaysia

2008-08-11T06:20:00.000-07:00

Here are a few shots from Kuala Lumpur, one of our favourite cities by far on this trip. Malaysia has turned out to be such an amazing place, considering we weren't even supposed to be here. Who needs China anyways?!?!?!?

Two sexy towers, and two sexy travellers in KL.

Amazing diversity in the architecture; just ONE more reason to visit KL!

Malaysia's national mosque. Trust us, this was big.

Perhentians: Paradise!!!!!!

2008-08-11T06:03:00.000-07:00

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. I offer you a few thousand words on the Perhentian Islands, Malaysia, along with 151 words for the captions. Beat that Howard Hughes!

This was the view, as we arrived by high speed boat to the Perhentians, on our first morning around 7 AM. Wow!

My friend, Sea Master, eating a rat he just caught on the beach. Sounds really gross, but it's a REALLY funny story for those who want to ask me about it. I love this EAGLE!

Seriously, this place was so relaxing, so beautiful, and so much fun. This was our view every evening, as the sun set, and the tide went out... minus me kneeling down. That was only for the picture.

One vantage point from our favourite spot on the beach. Did I mention those two blondes bathed topless? Oh those crazy Germans and French!

More Perhentian paradise!

Me and my baby sea turtle friend, Oscar.

The daily arrival of Asian tourists, learning to swim and snorkel in 3 foot deep water... with life jackets. Bless their hearts.

The Gibbon Experience

2008-07-12T22:39:00.000-07:00

Hello,

It's been a while since my last post. Lots has happened since my last message. After northern Thailand, we headed over into Laos, to get our dose of adventure for the trip. The source: The Gibbon Experience (http://www.gibbonx.org/)

The general idea: three days/two nights of intense jungle trekking in northern Laos, 5 hours from the nearest glimpse of town or village. To get around, a crazy jeep ride through a mountainous logging path, followed by a solid 5 hours of trekking a day. Then, we zip lined through the jungle canopy. For those of you not familiar with zip-lining, you basically get into a climbing harness, clip a safety carabiner onto the zip line, which consists of a steel cable tied from one tree to another. Then clip on the glider (two rollers secured on to the cable by another carabiner, and a piece of tire acting as the safety brake), drop off your feet, and your body weight does the rest for you! Next thing you know you're soaring over the junlge, at some points 150 plus meters over the jungle!

The longest crossing we did was a 400 meter long line connecting to a small platform built in a tree about 100 meters above ground. Then we changed our safety line to the second line, switched up our glider, and dropped onto the next 380 meter long line, which again took us high above the jungle canopy. We literally flew from one moutain top to another across the valleys! It was incredible. I have some video I'll be sure to share when I get back.

As for sleeping, no tents for us! We slept in jungle tree houses built high above the jungle floor. This was the hardest part for me with my fear of heights. Zip lining is one thing; it's so fast and so beautiful and the adrenaline is pumping as you let yourself drop off the edge of a slope and start zipping. But to sleep over and be confined to a tree house for several hours, at over 100 meters elevation was too much for me at times! Needless to say, no sleep for thos 2 nights for me! And Jennie was too worried about snakes to sleep well, so we were so tired by the time day 3 was done. Oh, and I couldn't use the toilet/shower either. The photos are self-explanatory!

Here are a few pics I hope will give you a small sense of what it was like. Oh, one last thing: there were about 50 spiders the size of my hand on the roof of our first tree house. One was eating a moth the size of a peach. Nice. Add to that the bats, rats, millipedes, jungle noises and total darkness in the tree house, and the faint of heart need not apply for the Gibbon Experience!!!

Welcome to the Jungle

2008-06-23T23:08:00.000-07:00

Hey boys and girls. This little post is all about our two day/one night trek in the mountains near Chiang Mai, Thailand. We met up with our dear friend Aruna in Bangkok, took an overnight train to Chiang Mai (where we drank one too many Beer Chang). From there, we went on a really cool trek to waterfalls, hot springs and amazing mountain scenes. We even met a little 2 month old monkey and rode elephants. Nice!

Jennie and Aruna chilling around the hot springs. This is at the source when temperatures reach between 170-190 C below the surface, and 95-100 at the surface. We chilled out in a pool further down the mountain, and it was still really hot. Too hot in the hot tub!

This is the first pic of the little baby monkey we met while on our trek. It was rescued by a local family that lives in the mountains. Sadly, their dog got into a fight with the monkey's mother and killed her. So the family has adopted the little guy to try and help him grow up. He was so scared when we first showed up, but was also really curiouse to see so many faces. He would cry and hide, but as soon as we walked away to leave him alone, came back out and called out to us. I love this monkey!

Aruna and the baby Monkey!

These guys look alike. Maybe they are related.

Jennie and I also found our inner Kung Fu masters on the mountain top

This is my drunken Monkey style attack!

The view from the top of one of the mountain tops.

We slept over in the jungle at an elephant camp. The locals told us the elephants were chilling in the jungle we we got there in the evening, but that the elephants would return in the morning. We weren't sure about that one, but sure enough, the next morning we awoke to 4 huge elephants in our backyard, by the river. Very cool.

Here I am, getting off our elephant Ernest. I had started on the back of the elephant, with Aruna and Jennie riding in the saddle part. We didn't have enough room for all 3, so our guide asked me to ride bare-back. Since he had been calling me Rambo the whole time I figured, "why not?"

Well after about 40 minutes, my legs were shaking, my legs were red from rubbing up against the coarse hair of the elephant (they are not soft!), Ernest has unsuccessfully tied on several occasion to knock my fat ass of his head, and even sprayed me with a mixture of snot and water from his trunk. He made his point: I was not welcome on his head! Aruna valiantly took over, and rode him like no one has ever rode and elephant before! I was able to relax on the seat, and enjoy the rest of the ride.

No Dice China

2008-06-21T01:24:00.003-07:00

Just a quick update for people. In case you've been following the news about massive protests in the streets of Bangkok over the current regime, there's no need to worry. They've been peaceful thus far, and Jennie and I are in the north, heading into Laos in a few days anyway.

Also, the Chinese government has decided to close up shop for the Olympics, at least at this time. They are actively denying foreigners travel visas, including to people with tickets for the Olympic events, and CEOs wishing to visit their factories in the Southern provinces. They've also kicked out expat workers, many who have been in China for several years already. Why? Namely the fear of more protests over the Tibet issue from Western tourists, which could undermine China's glorious "coming out party". China seems to believe that to come out to the rest of the world, they should also shut people out.

The recent tragic events in the Sichuan province, culminated with the flooding in Southern China, are making things even more difficult for travellers, especially when seeking a visa outside one's country. So, unfortunately Jennie and I will no longer be going to China for our last month of the trip. We have a pretty cool alternative: we'll be hitting up Malaysia, both the peninsula and Borneo for the better part of our last month, and try to hit up Singapore as well, before heading to Hong Kong for our trip back home. Hope this relieves any worries anyone may of had.

Lastly, I won't be posting for the next couple of weeks as the internet connections here are way too slow, and I suspect they'll be worse in Laos. Look for some updates in the beginning on July! Hope all is well with you all.

ZA

Mekong Delta

2008-06-14T03:35:00.000-07:00

The following is an assortment of shots taken during our 3 day trip through the Mekong Delta, on our way into Cambodia via the Mekong river.

These are some of the biggest pieces of sushi, EVER! We had these at a great little resto in Saigon called Sushi Bar, before heading out for the Mekong Delta. No sushi restaurants there.

This is a pretty typical view along the various waterways of the Delta. Hundreds of boats, shacks, fisherman, and sadly, very polluted water.

Case and point. Just be glad I didn't take any pictures of the numerous floating dead dogs, pigs, and unidentified animals.

This is one of the many floating markets. This is for B2B only: retailers come by every morning to get produce for their shops. Each boat has a bamboo stand at the front of the boat, where the merchant can place whatever produce he/her is selling. Point of purchase display of a different kind.

More market madness!

This was a really cute puppy we found chilling on some bags of rice at a rice factory along the river. He was fast asleep while the rice husker was going full tilt just around the corner.

Jennie, making her way across the very narrow bridge to a local Cham ethnic village, right near the border with Cambodia.

This is indeed a bridge, made from a single width of bamboo.

A local family, chilling and fishing in the Delta.

Jennie makes a dash for the border. This was the funniest thing ever. We walked into the security check point by the back door, then had to wake up the customs officer from his nap. We then proceeded to go through a metal detector which exited towards the very spot we came in by. Basically we could have left our bags waiting fo us outside, then go through security, then right back out to our bags. And that's all because we woke the guy up! More to come with pics from Cambodia, but the internet is really slowing down, so that will have to wait for a faster connection. I'm out!

Mui Ne, Vietnam

2008-06-14T02:50:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since my last post. After our stint in Mui Ne we headed into the Mekong Delta region of Vietnam, before heading into Cambodia. Let's just say internet was pretty much non-existent for the last 2 weeks. I'm now in Bangkok, so you guys get to finally see some pics from our last month, or so. Hope you enjoy these! This bunch is from our time in Mui Ne.

This was the view from our room at the resort in Mui Ne. Not too bad!

The water wasn't exactly calm, but it made for a nice spot to chill out on a hot afternoon.

This pic was taken from our a little spot called Pogo Bar. Cheap/good food, Kruder and Dorfmeister on the stereo, and some pool tables by the ocean. Nice!

Our pool. Literally ours; the only other guests were Vietnamese, and they don't come out to swim before 5 PM, so that they can keep that attractive pale shade. The darker your skin, the more likely you work a labourer's job, so the whiter the better. Meanwhile Jennie and were there all day long getting a nice tan. Oh well, worked out nicely for us!

This is Jennie and the White Sand dunes, about 40 minutes outside Mui Ne. We took an old U.S. military jeep out with a guide for the morning and went to these dunes, the Red dunes, Fairy Stream, and some weird run-off formations in the sand the locals call a "Canyon". Okay there.

The "Canyon". Nuff said.

The Red dunes.

Fairy Stream. I am not the fairy. In fact, at this point I was rather pissed off, cause our guide failed to mention we'd be walking in the water. Walking in water is no big deal right? Well, the problem was the cows defecating nearby, with the waste making its way into the stream. Compound that to the fact that I had an open cut on my foot, and you get an angry Zach. The first aid kit came in handy to clean the cut. I'm alive and well!

The DMZ, Cu Chi tunnels and the Rambonization of the 'American War'

2008-05-29T07:03:00.000-07:00

Well, I expected some tanks, guns and tunnels, but what I also found on our numerous Vietnam War (or American War as it is called here--when you've had so many wars throughout your history, you can't very well call every war "Vietnam" now can you?) expeditions was something different altogether. Some of it was informative, some of it tacky à la Disneyland, and some of it just plain sad.

When I say sad I mean two very different things; one the one hand, you have the very visible scars of the American War, both on the landscape and the people. Thousands still bear the effects of the massive air-bombing campaigns that dropped agent orange defoliants and destructive napalm bombs. The results are the children of soldiers and villagers who had the misfortune to live in the effected areas. Deformities, cancers, and mental development problems are just some of the ills that plague an entire generation.

Then there are the government-run factories, where the disabled are "encouraged" to work, producing crafts that the tour companies proudly tout. When you're on one of these Cu Chi tunnel visits, a mandatory stop by all tour companies on their way to the tunnels is one such factory. Walking through the shop, without any opportunity to talk to the workers or put any context to what you witness, is just a quick guilt trip before you are quickly whisked into the gift shop, where marked up products adorne a well light and air conditioned shopping area. Funny, there wasn't any AC in the workers area. And that's what we were allowed to see. I can only imagine what the other parts of the factory looked like. This was gross voyeurism at its worst. The whole sham had an air of "come look at the poor deformed workers." And of course, once the quick peep show made you feel bad, "please take a look in our gift shop to ease your guilt!" Jennie and I weren't impressed.

The other thing that really got to us was the way in which the war, particularly the actions and personification of the Americans, was approached. Our experience, having visited the DMZ (De-Militarized Zone, the once VERY militarized area along the 17th parallel in central Vietnam), various Ho Chi Minh museums (every city has its Uncle Ho museum, and they are pretty much all the same: Uncle Ho is the greatest human being in the history of mankind, if not the history of the solar system, and children loved him), the War Remnants Museum (formerly called the Museum of Chinese and American War Crimes) and the Cu Chi tunnels 60 KM north of Saigo... I mean Ho Chi Minh City, is that the Vietnamese regime has a very selective memory of the events that took place here 40 years ago. No context is ever given to explain images in exhibit displays. Instead petty, if not childish, textboxes accompany images in many museums. I expected some propaganda in a "Communi$t Republic", but some of the stuff has been in real poor taste. Examples include an image of a frightened soldier at the Khe Sanh military base on the day of the famous attack, with the caption: "What is President Johnson thinking now?", or the voice over of a "documentary" at the Cu Chi tunnels explaining how one VC guerrilla was an "American Killing Hero" with over 200 Americans killed. Charming.

Watching movies was is a big part of my life, and one gem stuck with me from the moment my dad and I first watched it; Full Metal Jacket. One line has stuck in my head since that day, and on every war-related visit here: "War is Hell". Maybe that's an obivous statement to some, but I think it holds true, particularly here. The Americans did horrible things during the American War. So did the North Vietnamese. And the VC too. To play revisionist's history and pretend that every Vietnamese was throwing flowers at the "liberation forces" when Saigon fell in 1975, is to do an injustice to those who died; on both sides.

Today at the Cu Chi tunnels, where many died, you can now climb some of the destroyed tanks as your guide exclaims, "you look like Rambo!". You can even shoot your weapon of choice from a shopping list of American War guns. I decided on the AK-47, at 10 bullets for 200,000 Vietnamese Dong (about $12.50). Why? Partly curiousity like most of the other guys there. I do say guys, cause not a woman was to be seen shooting the weapons. Only us dumb guys.

The other reason was something my good friend Trevor calls an "International Regret", which is where you have the chance to do or purchase something while in another country, but don't because it's too much money or not practical, etc. We've all had them. Well, I've tried to avoid as many international regrets on this trip.

I'm glad I tried it, but it really wasn't that much fun. For one, the Vietnamese soldier loading the bullets looked at me as if to say, "You stupid yuppy white guy! How can you spend that much money on 10 bullets when the average Vietnamese makes $80 a month?". Another reason? Well, I never realized just how brutal being in a shooting range is. The sounds. The smell. The general hate-vibe that is felt. It may sound dumb, but firing weapons is a REALLY violent act. Not just the end result, but the very act of shooting is very angry. I may be bitter, but I'm not a violent person.

At any rate, seeing the places I had only read about or seen in the movies was very enriching, just as visiting the beaches in Normandy, or Vimy Ridge in France, or the Dachau concentration camp in Germany had been. But the Vietnam sites left me with a sour taste in my mouth. There's something to be said about the atrocities of war. And I suppose there are two ways to go about telling those stories. Sadly, we only got to see one side. At least we got to look like Rambo for a morning.

Halong Bay: My Pics

2008-05-20T07:50:00.000-07:00

Howdy,

Well I promised some pics of mine from Halong Bay, so here they are. No too many words required, they're pretty self-explanatory!

Halong Bay is pretty much a little paradise.

Dusk was a great time to catch a sunset, or work out.

Jellyfish ARE NOT good to swim with!

There are fishermen/women a-plenty, here catching jellyfish. Yummy!

Here are some shots from the little village we visited, you know, the one where the little kid wanted to hurt us (if this doesn't ring a bell, read my previous post about the Halong Bay trip).

Chilling.

When in Rome (or should I say, When in a Communi$t Republic such as Vietnam).

Well, that's all folks, at least for now (or until I can find something faster than a F#$%@ 56k hook up), this took almost an hour!!!!!!

My Own Twilight Zone Episode in Hanoi!

2008-05-11T22:25:00.001-07:00

"You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension - a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into the Twilight Zone."
-Rod Sterling

The story I'm about to tell you doesn't involve any paranormal activity, or monsters, or any travel through time and space. It is however one of the weirdest things to ever happen to me. Therefor, I'm dubbing it my very own Twilight Zone episode. If you're curious, then read on.

It's 4:40 PM. I'm chilling the the lobby our hostel. We start chatting with some Canadian girls. Jennie heads over to the nearby computers, only to find that the Woman in Black, a thin woman of around 40 years wearing a black dress, who is now sitting in the back of the room, smoking quietly and drinking her coffee, has left her Yahoo account open. Upon informing her, she hurries over, in a state of confusion. She struggles to thank us in English, and I can tell she's a French-speaker; Swiss to be exact. I speak to her in French, and she immediately thanks us again. Odd, but nice I suppose.

I go back to our conversation with the Canadians. A tap on the shoulder. "Excuse me", Woman in Black shyly asks, "Do you travel much?". A normal question I suppose. I answer that I've travelled a fair bit, and ask why she asks. "Well, I have been travelling for a while, and I suspect my bank account has been accessed by someone other than me, and I am worried. Perhaps you can help me? Also, I have reason to believe that someone has cracked my email account."

I explain that she should contact her bank regarding her account. As for the email, I show her how to change her password and explain that while travelling, especially when using public computers, it would be wise to change her password fairly frequently. A look of complete confusion comes over Woman in Black's face. "Well no, if I do that, I will lose all my emails. I can't do that!", she says. I kindly explain the difference between changing a password and deleting emails. I also try to explain the difference between deleting the cache memory and any browsing history. Again, a look of total confusion, as though I am speaking Vietnamese to this Woman in Black.

Now I am no computer aficionado, as my Montreal buddies will let you know, but there are basics that I would expect some people to know, especially those who have an email account and use it abroad while travelling. But oh well. I help the Woman in Black. I show her two times in a row how to change her password, then kindly say goodbye and return to my conversation for the now third time. The Woman in Black lights another cigarette, awkwardly returns to the back of the hostel dinning area, alone, and sips another cup of coffee in the dimly-lit area. It would not be the last time I encounter the Woman in Black

Fast forward to 12:45 AM that same night. I am in bed, watching TV, about to ge to sleep, when suddenly, there's a loud knock on my door. "Who the hell is that?", Jennie asks. I go to check, but I have no peep hole. I slowly open the door, only to see a completely distraught Woman in Black, holding a cigarette in her trembling hand. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I need your help. I think my life is in danger and I don't know who else to talk to!"

What the hell is going on?

"I'm sorry, but I'm not sure I'm the person you should be talking to", I tell her. "Perhaps you should talk to Nam, the hostel owner. He's very friendly and helpful."

"No!", the Woman in Black shouts, "He doesn't speak French. I need to talk to a French speaker!"

Okay. At this point I get a feeling something is up. I think back to the afternoon conversation with the Woman in Black, and how she explained that she suspected her bank account was defrauded. I quickly prepare myself for some pathetic story about how she has no more money, and needs me to front her some cash. I prepare myslef to get nasty and tell her off, but there's something about the Woman in Black's face; tears begin to form in her eyes and she continues to tremble as though she just saw a ghost. I figure she's either the world's best con artist, or she's genuinely scared for her life. I decide to give her the benefit of the doubt and go downstairs to the lobby dinning area with her.

Woman in Black proceeds to tell me her Asian life story, from her time in Bangkok, her visa troubles, the man from Cameroon she met, and would later have a 3-day affair with. WHOAH, too much info! I keep politely asking her to get to the point, and what her trouble is. For 20 minutes, Woman in Black is going on, telling me tales about her almost 6 weeks spent in Southeast Asia thus far. I really lose my patience.

"What exactly do you want to tell me? What does any of this have to do with your life being in danger?", I ask in an obviously pissed off tone.

"Well," the Woman in Black answers, "The man from Cameroon asked me to be friends with him. I only wanted a little fun, but he kept insisting that we stay friends. I figured a little companionship would be nice. So I said yes. But then, he started revealing things to me, like that he used to be with the Cameroon army, and that he is now a footballer in Bangkok. he also told me that he likes surprises, and that he would like to surprise me and visit me in Hanoi."

It's now 1:20 AM. I'm thinking, WTF is going on? I again ask her what the point of all of this is, and tell her that I need to get up early, and that unless she tells me what her problem is, I'm going back to bed.

"Well, the problem is that I was using my email yesterday, and suddenly, a text box appeared on my screen. It was from him, asking if I would be his friend.", Woman in Black explains. "I figured, this is weird, but okay. I am all alone, so a friend would be nice. But since then, every time I use my email account, these weird text boxes appear on the screen, with questions from him. And my aunt usually write back to me right away, but it's been almost 12 hours since I've last heard from her."

"And? What the hell does any of that matter?", I tell her.

"Well, I have reason to believe he's taken over my email account and is somehow taking control of the computers I'm using. How else could he send me text boxes? Why else would my aunt not answer me quickly?"

Suddenly, I realize the "weird" text boxes are instant message chats, from her Yahoo account. The "friendship request" was him adding her to Yahoo chat. WTF, this is what the tears, trembling, and 12:45 AM wake-up call was for? And how the hell did she know what room to knock on? All this goes through my head. I laugh, not knowing how to explain this to her, cause she clearly has no clue.

"This guy has been sending you IMs, chat messages, from his Yahoo account to yours!", I explain.

"What? What is chat?", Woman in Black retorts.

At this point I'm think HOLY SHIT, I can't deal with you right now. I explain to her that chatting is like talking on the phone, but typing. Woman in Black says, "So it's another e-mail account?"

I see another guy on the computer, chatting. I politely tell her that she should go see what that guy is doing. He's chatting. As for her life being in danger; absolutely not. "And if you think it really is," I add, "then you need to contact the Swiss embassy. I'm sorry but I'm not the one you should be telling all this to. And, given the state you're in, I really think it's time you end your vacation and head back home."

"So my life is not in danger?", Woman in Black asks.

I laugh, "No, your life is not in danger. If this is bothering you, change your email address, and don't add this Cameroon guy. That'll be the end of this story."

"Yes, but what about the tex boxes that appear?", Woman in Black asks again.

I can't help but laugh again. "You'll be fine. Good night!"

As I make my way up the stairs, back to my room, the Woman in Black quietly returns to her table in the back of the dimly-lit dinning room, lights another cigarette, and takes another sip out of her coffee.

I return to my room, realizing this is one of the weirdest things to ever happen to me, hoping to never again see the Woman in Black.

Halong Bay: The Land of 2,000 Islands

2008-05-11T21:46:00.000-07:00

This place is REALLY cool!

I can't load any pictures on the computer I'm using, but I will go back and add some soon, I hope. Until then, hopefully my writing will suffice. I have included some random google images pics for now. I'll put mine up as soon as I can.

(Source: http://www.beihai2000.com/images/viet/halong/halong27.jpg)

We booked a 3-day tour, which included a night stay on a fancy junk boat, and a second night on chilled out Cat Ba Island, the largest of all the islands. We had a great crew of Brits, Irish, French, and an older Malaysian couple who probably wished they booked another tour without us young folk. Oh well, we were nice!

Day 1: An interesting 3.5 hour bus drive from Hanoi to Halong City started off our day. In case you're not familiar with Vietnamese driving, picture your busiest city street, say Rene Levesque Boul. in Montreal, but instead of cars and stop lights, the street is filled with 5 times as many motorbikes, and no stop lights. In fact, I don't think there are brakes in the country. Only gas pedal and horn. And boy, do they know how to use it. I'll post a video I took in our bus, that is pretty self-explanatory. Every couple of minutes or so, our bus would pass a bus that was passing another bus, with a huge trunk coming at full speed in the on-coming lane. This is where that zen/don't care anymore attitude needs to kick in. It's crazy driving. The sooner you accept that, the better your stay will be!

Needless to say the islands are one of the most beautiful areas I've ever been to. It's a paradise-like setting, with endless limestone islands that emerge from Halong Bay like tree-covered giants. We visited some HUGE caves and chilled around the Bay. We then took the kayaks out and went for some exploring, where we got to see some jelly-fish, an awesome monkey shaking a tree branch to scare us (he failed, we just laughed at him) and an eagle diving into the water to catch fish for the little ones in her nest. Awesome!

(Source: http://www.crossingjournal.com/images/halong%20bay1.jpg )

We got to jump off our boat's 2nd storey roof (the third was just too high!) and swim the warmest waters I've ever been in. The night was amazing, and the first time we've seen the stars in Asia. Everywhere else is either too polluted or cloudy.

Day 2: The second day saw us and the Brits go on, while the others had only paid for 2 days and made their way back to Hanoi. We went biking into one of the larger islands. Biking in the hills without breaks is interesting. Once in the little village, we witnessed a few odd things:

1) a siamese-twin dog, with two front bodies, but one rear body. Weird. I went back to get a photo, but it disappeared, BUT I SWEAR I SAW IT! you'll have to take my word for it ;-)

2) a little vietnamese boy from the village, who took devilish pleasure in hitting one of the Brits (Ben); first with his fist, then whipping him with a stick, which he proceeded to throw at his head. When Ben and I walked back past him, he now had a little knife in his hand. We ran past him and continued down the road. When we left the village, back to our boat, other kids made sure to punch us again. Nice goodbye present!

Later that day we went to Cat Ba Island, chilled out, and ended the evening with a small micro-brew type drink called Bia Hoi; it's basically home-made 3% beer that costs about 33 cents, and is REALLY good.

The next morning we headed back to Hanoi and left behind the beauty that is Halong Bay. Truly a must see!

(Source: http://www.friedrichs.us/Vietnam-Photos/3-239-Ha-Long-Boat-Islands-R.jpg )

Welcome to Hanoi!

2008-05-11T21:22:00.000-07:00

Hey guys and gals,

So, Hanoi has been... interesting to say the least. Some of you will probably know about the story that follows, but it's worth putting into words, so that there will be an archive of my frustrations to look back upon when I reach a state of complete zen, forced upon me by the sheer fact that if I don't accept Vietnam--and Asia to a greater extent--for what it is, I will perhaps go insane. Most of you know that I can be a fairly intense and emotional person, and that sometimes I get worked up. Well, Vietnam is seriously putting me to the test. Just ask Jennie :-)

BTW- I'm skipping our time in Macau, because we were only there for 1 day and not much happened. Just picture Las Vegas in Asia, surrounded by a developing Asian country, and neighbouring the PRC. There's Macau in a nutshell! For more, check Jennie's blog.

Back to Hanoi. So, our plane from Bangkok was delayed well over an hour. No worries. On the flight over we met some nice Canadians; one who is persuing her PhD research in Hanoi. She told us about some friends of hers running a nice hostel, but we informed her we had already reserved a nice place (or so Lonely Planet said) on hostels.com But whatever, it's good to have other options I figured. Oh boy would this ring true later that night!

Our flight lands in Hanoi around 11:00 PM. The immigration officer, a pimply 20 year old I gather, greets me with some mean sounding Vietnamese and gesturing. I think, "Thank you, nice to meet you too", but I keep my mouth shout. It's late, there are guns. Being a smart-ass is probably not the best thing to do. After immigration, we get our stuff, and part with the Canadians. Our student friend tells us to call her if there's anything. Good thing I got her number. We find a cab (my buddy Huy warned me about the private driver scheme, so we went with the reputable white or yellow-shirted drivers). We get ushered in, only to have some random guy tell our driver something in Vietnamese. Humm, this seems a little off.

We drive in the darkness that is Hanoi night time (hardly any street lights) for about 45 minutes. Then the driver stops in front of the wrong hotel. Some drunk guy opens Jennie's door, "Give me your reservation number!" We explain this isn't the hostel we reserved. No matter. "I bring you to my friend hotel. Very nice!". Ughh, no.

I reiterate to the driver in a stern tone that I want the Stars Hostel. He finally finds it and let's us out, after trying to keep extra change. Ughh, no.

Buddy at the hostel, in the four English words he knows, explains that we have no reservation, the price is no longer $8/person/night (now $26), and that he will bring us to his friend's nicer hotel. Ughh, no.

So it's midnight in Hanoi, ther are no street lights, the only guy on the street is pissing on a tree, and we've only been in the country 1 hour, and already 3 people have tried to screw us.

Needless to say, I called up that favour with the Canadian girl, got into her friend's really nice and clean hostel, Little Hanoi, and all ended well.

Welcome to Hanoi!

ZA

Habs vs. Leafs, even in the PRC!

2008-04-30T07:00:00.000-07:00

I took this pic at the HK Museum of History. There was a small temporary exhibit on China's propaganda posters. This one jumped out:

You can't read the small description but it says:
Great Game of Ice Hockey, oil painting by Yangzu Lao. This image depicts the great game of hockey and the hopes of a great nation in its healthy youth. It shows the diversity of activities for young people in 1950's PRC, and that the Montreal Canadiens can kick Toronto Leafs ass, even in China. Go Habs Go!

It's all true, I swear!

The Future of Tomorrow, TODAY in HK!

2008-04-30T06:53:00.000-07:00

This can't be right, can it?

2008-04-30T05:59:00.000-07:00

Well, I figured some of you would get a kick out of this pic. Politically correct? Absolutely not. Does it really matter? Absolutely not. Going on my now 5th day in HK, I'm not quite sure what I think about this city/SAR. My relationship with this beautiful/ugly city is two-fold. At times HK takes my breath away, a la Berlin song. At other times, I just shake my head and think, that ain't right! Seriously.

For instance, yesterday, Jennie and I were ridding the tram (which has become our favourite mode of transportation, at a mere HK$2.00 per ride, or about CND$ 0.25) and enjoying the morning bustle of Central, with all the little worker bees, thousands of them, running off to their jobs. Then, the tram came to a stop, as it usually does at cross-walks. But this stop was of a different kind. And believe me, I wish I had my camera ready for this one. I check out in front from our second-level seat, only to see some dude hanging his head outside his buddy's BMW, hurling last night's party sauce. And not just the slight evacuation. We're talking projectile.

What's the point of me telling you this? Well, it was funny as hell, gross, frustrating (we seriously missed two green lights cause the buddy didn't want to drive away with his friend puking off the side of his nice BMW 5 Series, and thus dirty his cute paint job), and all out confusing. Just like my experiences in HK. For each cool moment, I've had just as many "serenity now" moments. And not over the course of several hours. We're talking in the same instance! Take my day trip to Lamma Island yesterday, a short ferry ride away from HK Island. This was to be a nice escape from the hustle and bustle of the city. No cars. Fishing villages. Beaches. You know it!

Pretty cool. Jennie and I stop for some awesome dumplings for breakfast. This is nice!

This was what I was looking for! So we finish eating, keep walking along the village, making our way through the trail. We see some cute dogs (one looked like a cross between a Rottweiler and my dog Duncan, and Basset Hound). Then, as we cross a clearing near one of the mountains, some of the smoke stacks from the HUGE power station appear. This was my take on it. For another check out Jennie's blog: http://footprintsinasia.blogspot.com/

Happy times. I guess even sleepy fishing villages, with no cars, need their multi million mega-ton producing coal generators.

Whatever the confusion/frustration with the paradox of the beautiful Lamma Island scenery with the HUGE eye-sore, it was worth it for the awesome meal at the end of the hike! What made it even better was that is was sold to us by a very enthusiastic restaurant owner who literally jumped at us and told us all about his specials for us. He obviously knows the ABC of sales: Always Be Closing. And what a close he did. At the end of his routine, as we walked away, he gave Jennie and me a wink, and exclaimed in a rather high pitched voice: "You give me money, I give you food!"

Hehehe, I love it.

ZA

2 Days in Hong Kong: Damn you Road sign God!!!!

2008-04-28T00:50:00.000-07:00

Hello again,

You may remember that last time you read about this trip, I was still in St-Bruno, chilling in my parents' back yard, awaiting my first of many flights on this four month epic trip I have dubbed "Monkey Time". Well today, only a couple of days later, I find myself writing this post atop Victoria Peak (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victoria_Peak), one of the main summits on Hong Kong Island. I'm in the ultra touristy and cheezy summit Peak Tower, where one can enjoy, among other things: Burger King, BubbaGump shrimp restaurant (yes, from the movie) or tons of high end boutiques, etc. Very odd indeed. But it is, what it is. I've come to expect the unexpected in Hong Kong.

For instance, our first night here, after the actually really good 16 hour flight on Continental (seriously, if you have to be on a plane that long, I can't imagine it being any better than Continental's flight was...hopefully someone at Continental reads this and gives me free flights, so I can post some more about HOW AWESOME FLYING ON CONTINENTAL AIRLINES IS! FOR GOOD TIMES, MAKE IT CONTINENTAL TIMES!

Anyways, after landing, Jennie and I headed for dt HK and walked around the sea of neon lights and really fast walking/talking people all over the street. The goal: find our hostel. The challenge: no signage. Whatsoever. Luckily, some really nice shopgirls in a high end clothing store, dressed up like little school girls, and their clients, helped us find our way and even called the hostel for us. How nice!

Our first day was spent walking around, getting our bearings, and zig-zagging from side to the other of the free way system. Because in my foolishness, I thought that walking along the harbour would be scenic. WRAONG! But anyways, we made it to city hall, 2 hours later and had some awesome dim sum. Then we walked up the city a bit towards the botanical and zoological gardens. This was a really chill (and FREE) park with quite a few birds and gardens, and... MONKEYS. Oh yes, your humble scribe only needed one day to encounter the monkeys and apes he sought so dearly. Well, mission accomplished. Jennie and I had the pleasure of enjoying some macaques, lemures, samure monkeys, and the highlight, some huge Orangutans. Especially when one female decided to climb for what we thought would be some acrobatic feats, only to surprise us with a down pour of supreme urination. Thank you female orangutan, for the laughs!

We also checked out some cool aviaries and some more chilled out Hong Kong Park scenery in the middle of the hectic scene that is this crazy city.

And last night, Jennie and I also watched the latest Jackie Chan and Jet Li gōngfū (kung fu) movie called Forbidden Kingdom. A little cheezy, but cool to see a kung fu movie in the land of Bruce Lee. Speaking of which, we got our picture taken with a wax figure of the legendary martial artist.
“Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless - like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup, you put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, you put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”

Well, I have far exceeded my 15 minute time limit on this computer, so I bid you a fond farewell until my next post.

Gambei!
ZA

This time, I will try to add posts... more than thrice

2008-04-24T15:15:00.000-07:00

Greetings Friends, Romans, Countrymen,

If you are reading this, it is because you are my friend. Or perhaps a nemesis. Either way, you are probably curious to see what I'm up to. Well, hopefully this site will serve you well in this undertaking (hopefully better than my European blog, which lasted a grand total of 3 posts-- but what masterful posts those were!). Jennie and I are leaving tomorrow morning from Montreal at 9:30 AM. By 6:30 PM Hong Kong time...I will be in Hong Kong. Holy crap!